Since becoming pregnant I have been targeted- targeted! – by infantilising, weird baby talk. Pink websites telling me to ‘make time for me time’, comparing babies to fruit and reminding me not to ‘forget about hubby!’. It’s like being transported back in time. I’m almost 40 years old. I have a career. I have a Masters degree. I do not need to read about taking care of my husband’s needs in oversized Comic Sans font. He takes care of his own needs – he’s an adult human being.
I managed to find one website which is sensibly written by professional midwifery staff – the Tommys page. Most others (‘What to Expect’, ‘Bounty’ etc) are full of exclamation marks and make me want to punch my phone.
Anyway somewhat related to this is the need to go ‘Facebook official’. The fact that this is even a phrase, and therefore a ‘thing’, says it all really. It kind of makes me want to puke. I mainly hate Facebook, it’s full of humble bragging – perfectly edited posts about someone’s yoga class, gifted children or expensive holiday. It’s self indulgent and frankly weird, nobody would put up with such ‘look at MEEE’ism in real life. #blessed incites rage. Yet it’s also strangely compelling – ooh look, Julie from sixth form has a new lawn mower!
SO – what is my point exactly. Well, husband and I have friends and family scattered all over the world. We are not going to be able to call everyone and tell them our news. It would be easier to post something on Facebook – but then I’m caving in to everything outlined in the paragraph above. It’s also a massive ‘in your face’ to all our contacts who would love to be pregnant but aren’t, for various private reasons of their own. Tough one. I’m going to think about it over the next few days. Maybe people don’t actually need to know? Maybe they really don’t care? Perhaps they would prefer to live in blissful ignorance, as we all used to in the early 90s. Whatever we decide to do, it will not involve comparing babies to fruit.